Big deep breath

I can breathe again. I didn’t realize how long I had been holding my breath but now that I have let it out I can see how long it was held. Today the other half of my heart has returned to US soil.…


Multitasking momma

Can anyone get through life without multitasking these days? I do it so much that it feels weird when I do a single thing by itself. When I work out, I catch up on my tv shows. Making dinner means emptying the dishwasher.…



Several years ago my husband and I moved out to the middle of nowhere and forever changed our lives. It started innocently enough, we lived in the suburbs of Denver and we thought that before our son started school would be a good…


Happy anniversary!

Today I celebrate my 12th wedding anniversary without my husband, but luckily I don’t celebrate it alone. I have two dates this time around. Last year Rick was able to come home from his pre-mobilization training for a couple days and we took…


The summit

In the beginning of deployment you count the days. You say to yourself “I can’t believe it’s been 26 days since I hugged him” or “43 days ago he was here, on the couch, holding my hand”. Those early days tick by so…



Walk a mile in my shoes. Hell, walk 5 feet and you will see the struggle I endure every day. They call me strong, they call me tough. They see the calm exterior and the smile on my face. But inside I may…



The other day someone asked me if things would “go back to normal” once my husband got home from deployment. My instant reaction was to say yes, it would. But that conversation got me thinking about reintegration. I hear it’s a pretty difficult…


Ahhhhhh Father’s Day

This may well be one of the more complex holidays. There are many dimensions and components of it. As a mother, it is your responsibility to make sure your kids know it’s Father’s Day and wish their dad well. There are presents to…


The wall

Sometimes you hit a wall. This wall seems immovable, impassable. There is no way around it, over it, through it. You stand at the foot of this wall and it seems that much bigger. It’s daunting how high it is – you can’t…


Proud mom moment

I have become a master at organizing my day so that I can squeeze certain tasks into certain slots. There are some things around the ranch that I just can’t do with my youngest around, mostly things with the horses. This morning I…